Blogging DS9, S1E9: "Move Along Home"

S1E9: "Move Along Home"
Or The Ferengi's Pawns

"Is it against Starfleet policy to press a few buttons?"
-Constable Odo

I have to start by stating that "Move Along Home" is the DS9 episode I remember more than any other. Perhaps it was the striking visuals or maybe the conceit of a role playing board game, but regardless, I remembered nearly every turn of the episode. And somehow, my memory did not do its quality justice.

"Move Along Home" manages to leverage the great freedoms of the Star Trek series while breaking away from its older sister's shadow. After all, this is the franchise that had Captain Kirk nailing bright green women and Picard commanding staff from multiple bright blue species. Both the Wadi themselves and the game the four Starfleeters are thrown into are colorful and eye-catching. The decision to build a set where the halls and rooms seem to have the same architecture yet accommodate wildly different twists was very clever, and the overhead shot of Sisko in the triangular room was really well conceived.

Furthermore, the opening scene where the Wadi are far more interested in getting to Quark's than first contact is a refreshing acknowledgment that yes, these overly grown-up Federation types are a bit stiff, and no, the universe is not a study in etiquette. To this point, we have already seen different new races come through the Wormhole, and the writers' choice to demonstrate that not all of them share the same value platform greatly widens their range of future offerings.

And yet, this episode could easily have slid into a TNG rescue-mission pattern. When Odo boarded the Wadi vessel looking for the game's source, it felt like a typical Star Trek resolution where a perfect technological solution saves the day. So you can imagine how surprising it was to see Odo enter that shining doorway, only to reappear in Quark's.

In fact, if I had to criticize this episode in anyway, I would accuse the writers of trying to get too much into their 46 minutes. Quark seemed to realize that the four pieces represented the four missing officers too quickly, and I would have loved to have seen Kira, Dax, and Sisko struggle over losing Bashir a little longer. By the time they sang the rhyme of the hopscotch girl and realized they were playing a game, the episode was half over.

My other quick thoughts:

• I remember my dad used to be disgusted by the Starfleet dress uniform of this era. I used to think the idea of having a dress uniform with some gold scrawl on the lower collar was very cool, but now I agree with my dad: It just looks like a man wearing a dress.
• There are a few tricks the Star Trek writers rely on with comical frequency across the series, such as the tendency of the unknown ensign to be killed on away missions (Family Guy nailed this with the Ensign Ricci aside). Another is how it seems every important conversation a senior officer has is interrupted by the bridge, and Sisko's birds-and-bees talk with Jake is no exception. I know the writers needed a mechanism for Jake to bring his dad's absence to Odo's attention, but I think the station commander's son and chief of security would probably figure out he was missing soon enough.
• Give a lot of credit to the four actors in the game for their work on the rhyme/hopscotch scene. First, Kira and Bashir have to do the always awkward force field shock reaction. But then each of them has to sing the rhyme and complete the sequence, and I think each did an admirable job. The best was Avery Brooks' take on it. The obvious way for an overtly intense Starfleet commander to sing in front of three of his officers would be wrought with embarrassment and discomfort, but Brooks owned it with an enthusiastic New Orleans spin that felt completely believable.

4.5 bars of gold-pressed latinum out of 5

Blogging DS9, S1E8: "The Passenger"

S1E8: "The Passenger"
Or The Tragedy of Dirty Fingernails

"It's hard to keep secrets in a place like this."
-Commander Sisko

Sisko's warning to newly arrived Lieutenant Primmin is a coy wink from "The Passenger"'s writers and a clever nod to how important events that happen on the station and in front of our own viewing eyes can be. In this episode, which uses the single-episode-mystery-arc formula often successful across the series, the DS9 writers show a level of nuance missing from many of the first season's heavy-handed introductions.

Although "The Passenger" yet again eschews any secondary plot arcs in developing the primary story, it smoothly transitions from a whodunit first half into a relatively climactic second half, punctuated by a classic Star Trek in-the-nick-of-time solution. The beginning stage is incredibly effective, as the writers show in the enough information before the credits to know all along what the episode's big reveal turns out to be.  It is a classic example of how a twist can be hidden in plain sight by deft writing.

If there is one flaw with the alien consciousness hiding within Bashir, it is that a) The Star Trek franchise uses mental invasion very frequently b) the rules of this mechanism have never been clear to me. I understand Rao Vantika hiding within the unused part of Bashir's brain like dormant malware, waiting to spring to action. But if this kind of cerebral attack is as common as DS9 and TNG make it seem, I imagine the Federation would have taken more preventative action against it. You can't have senior staff members who possess vital passcodes and secrets being neurologically hijacked this often. With that said, "The Passenger" is one of the franchise's more successful uses of this mechanism, and Siddig El Fadil deserves a solid B for depicting the shift in consciousness through menacingly plodding diction.

While this episode does not have a true secondary story, the introduction of Lieutenant Primmin as chief Starfleet Security officer is noteworthy at this point in the series. I admit, I barely remember Primmin from my first run viewing, and part of me was expecting the squeaky clean stranger to be caught up in the sinister plot. I can say with honesty that I do not remember exactly how long Primmin's role lasts on the show, though I can promise he does not stay long enough to leave a lasting impression on the show's development. In retrospect, I'm not quite sure what motivated the writers to introduce him. Yes, I guess on some practical level, Starfleet would want its own security presence on this new frontier, and the stodgy Primmin reads well as some kind of G-man trying to bring iron-fisted order to the Wild West. But like Dr. Pulaski before him, Primmin's insertion is both awkward to the lives of the characters, as well as the exposition itself. Only nine hours into the series, we still have not seen a Kira-centric episode, and only glimpses into the pasts of the Siskos, Quark, and Bashir. In this episode, Primmin comes across incredibly stiff (probably by choice, not poor acting) and not as a character I would want to see studied in depth. I say this with little memory of what lies ahead for the Lieutenant: He seems poised to be a piece of furniture that doesn't fit comfortably in any room.

My other quick thoughts:

• Dax finds a chip in the ship transporting Rao Vantika that contains a map, she declares with some suspense, of the humanoid brain! This is another "out there" piece of science that only 18 years later I have a hard time believing would still be a mystery in the 2300s.
• You noticed Bashir taking off the comm badge, right?
• This is hardly limited to Star Trek, but won't villains eventually figure out that giving the good guys time to make a decision is a recipe for disaster. Vantika gives Sisko and company "one minute to decide" whether to let him go or risk killing Bashir with him. The trend continues in "The Prisoner;" that one minute is enough time for Dax to recalibrate the tractor beam to attack Vantika's consciousness.
• On the other hand, I thought the trick at the end to use the transporter to remove the cells with Vantika's consciousness through a transporter was a slick idea. 

3 bars of gold-pressed latinum out of 5

Blogging DS9, S1E7: "Dax"

S1E8: "Dax"
Or "My Inner Slug"

"When one of my kind stumbles... It is a mistake that is there forever."
-Lieutenant Dax

For all of the early-series missteps the DS9 writers made in "Q-Less" (and there were many), they rebounded nicely in the title-character-centric "Dax." The episode delves further into the nature of Trill existence while asking some intriguing questions about honor, statutes of limitations, and just how well we can really know another person. There is a smoothness to how this episode builds depth to Dax's character while further rejecting the notion that an immobile space station isn't interesting, as opposed to the awkward wink-wink forced participation of TNG retreads just the episode before.

The Dax character, along with Odo, is certainly one of the more mysterious constructs introduced at DS9's inception. As I remember someone saying to me during that first season, "The prettiest girl on the show a guy living inside her as a slug." And to this point in the series, the most substantial discussion of Dax's Trill identity was an awkward exchange where Sisko told Bashir he would not be an obstacle to the doctor's romantic pursuit.

The plot arc allows Terry Farrell and Avery Brooks to play the roles they seem most comfortable in with these characters. Farrell, who always seemed to have just heard a mildly humorous one-liner, effectively keeps Dax coolly detached from the defense of her own life while stonewalling the efforts to extract her great secret. When I think back on Farrell's Dax, I think of her engrossed yet under control while performing her duties or humoring her fellow crew members from emotional distance. This plot fit snugly into that wheelhouse.

And then there's Sisko. I made be a little hard on Brooks in these reviews. After all, he is more-or-less asked to be a black Patrick Stewart, wrestling between his Federation-issued moral zeal and the pragmatism it often defies. In "Dax," Sisko makes an impassioned case to spare the life of his science officer. In he moments when he seemed to be channeling the best of Jack McCoy from a New York courtroom, Brooks' intensity hit the mark. Of course, he attempted to jam that same intense square peg into his private plea to Dax to help him by divulging more information (lowlight: "Dammit, if you were still a man"), but let's at least stay positive for a post.

Furthermore, the opening scene demonstrated the level of "get me past the credits" intrigue TNG pulled off so often. If these first eight hours of DS9 stake any claim, it is that frontier life will often bring the unexpected, especially when that frontier flanks a wormhole to the Gamma Quadrant. The series' best moments come when the writers lean heavily on this premise.

Additional thoughts:

• Speaking of that opening scene, the writers deserve credit for not fixating on discord between the Bajoran and Federation crews. Perhaps this is a holdover of Roddenbury's "Let's get along" credo, but it would be easy to see envision a multi-episode theme where the two sides bristle with working together until they learn they must to survive. In "Dax"'s first minutes, we see Sisko, Kira, and Odo work together effectively to prevent Dax's captors from escaping. If the crew friction angle were strongly in play at this point, this would strike discordance.
• If Fionnula Flanagan looks familiar as Enina Tandro in this episode, you are probably a nerd. If you recognize her as Eloise Hawking from Lost, give yourself one nerd point. If you recognize her as Dr. Juliana Tainer (i.e., Data's Mom) from TNG, that's nerd checkmate.
• It appears there is no sexual harassment code in the Federation. Lucky you, Dr. Bashir.
• I have little expertise in the technical side of stage performance, but I found the fight scene between Bashir and Dax's captors confusing. First, Bashir probably would not give away the element of surprise by yelling Dax's name as he charged through the corridor, right? But most of all, he appears to knock himself down as he strikes the first captor. I also struggled to find the head trauma that would knock the doctor out. Are these failings of planning or execution?

3.5 bars of gold-pressed latinum out of 5

Blogging DS9, S1E6: "Q-Less"

S1E6: "Q-Less"
Or Julian Bashir, Intergalactic Pussy Hound

"The galaxy can be a dangerous place when you're on your own."
-Q

Friends, I know have been a little hard on DS9's first handful of episodes, outside of the pilot. And yes, I understand that starting a new series can be a little herky-jerky, as the writers try to introduce central elements of a full cast that will be using, they hope, for seasons to come. Perhaps I have been a little demanding of these first few episodes, but that should be colored by the fact that I know the series becomes very compelling as it grows. I do not have a comprehensive memory of the series (thus, these reviews), but I have a rough idea of where the high and low points lie.

And that is why I can write, with confidence, that "Q-Less" is the worst DS9 episode of the series.

This is a strong statement, but I will not qualify it. My strongest gripe with this episode is the way it assaults the viewer with TNG background plots. Nobody likes the guy who insists on making inside jokes foreign to new members of a group; but that guy is especially loathsome when those inside jokes aren't even that funny.

While Vash and Q are certainly not the low points of TNG, I cannot think of a single episode either appears in that is particularly memorable. Vash was a mildly amusing character, a sort of hooker-with-an-eye-for-gold witty enough to intrigue Picard. Her seduction of him adds some personality to Picard's standard rigidity, but I always felt like the writers saw a lot more in her character than I ever did.

And then there's Q. TNG is based, of course, on Q's evaluation of mankind, which is the direct premise for both that series' premiere and finale. And the juxatposition of Q's omnipotence with the mortal struggles of man has some value. On one hand, knowing that the show's universe houses a species that can be anywhere and do anything at will reduces to triviality many encounters in the series. Yet, the persistence that the crew of the Enterprise, and in this episode the crew of Deep Space 9, shows speaks to the nature of humanity. Our births and eventual deaths are inevitable, yet we strive to overcome obstacles in between those bookends in spite of that knowledge. This theme is mirrored in Odo and Quark's debate over the acquisition of material wealth, a pursuit Odo downplays due to the inevitability of death.

(On a side note, the scene also includes another Auberjonois-Shimerman dialogue gem:


Quark: I'm selling quallity merchandise to select clientele.
Odo: What makes them so... select?
Quark: They're all ridiculously wealthy... and not too bright.


This is yet another scene in which Odo humors Quark just long enough that we understand he has more interest in his would-be nemesis than procedure would merely dictate. Auberjonois does this subtly and expertly.)

And yet, why the writers pathetically leaned on old TNG crutches in this episode is hard to explain. From a plot standpoint, I guess Vash's collection of Gamma Quadrant goods is a reasonable way to get the shiny egg onto the station, putting it in climactic peril . But if you carefully consider the key points at which the episode turns, it becomes clear that it didn't even need to include Q. Q conveyed some vague references to Sisko about the danger Vash posed, but the crew eventually found the egg based on their creative solution without Q's influence. The first twenty minutes of the episode were wasted on Q and Vash's dreary bickering over what they had been up to for two years and Bashir's loverboy pursuits, which became a red herring anyway.

I know I have been demanding on the series. Dear reader and viewer, please take my word that DS9 is never as bad as "Q-Less."

A few items of novelty:

• In one of the most unbelievable and unnecessary stage directions in the series, the first segment ends with Q somehow hiding crouched over next to the runabout, roughly two feet from where Sisko is standing. Q, of course, would never actually have to hide to avoid discovery, but regardless, am I supposed to believe Sisko would not have seen Q in spite of the fact that he could have tripped over him?
• The bareknuckle boxing scene was humorous both in how out of place it seemed and in the actors' portrayals. The Gangs of New York-esque (yes, I know the episode predates that movie by the better part of a decade) mustache on Q was sadly a high point, and Avery Brooks was, per usual, overly emphatic.
• Almost as if the writers heard critical contemporaries make the same complaint about overusing Odo's shapeshifting, Quark starts rattling off objects Odo could have posed as while eavesdropping on his conversation with Vash. A small dose of self-awareness is always a funny touch.

1 bar of gold-pressed latinum out of 5

Blogging DS9, S1E5: "Captive Pursuit"

S1E5: "Captive Pursuit"
Or "An Irishman and a Tosk Walk into a Bar..."

"I live to outwit the hunters for another day."
-Tosk

"Captive Pursuit" borrows a traditional TNG story structure to illustrate the new-found Wormhole's potential. A mysterious stranger is introduced, the specifics of his cultural differences are humorously personalized through his friendship with a core crew member, and multiple levels of moral judgment are passed by the always-ready-to-judge Federation.

Deep Space 9's first visitor from the Gamma Quadrant turns out to be prey bred to elude its captors. But unlike prey species here on Earth, Tosk is a sentient creature O'Brien comes to befriend while repairing his vessel. The story is built on the concept of the Noble Savage, a staple of early American literature such as James Fennimore Cooper's Last of the Mohicans. This archetype depicts a humanoid that, while unenlightened by modern measures like European or Federation standards, demonstrates inherent quality of character through just and moral actions. Like Cooper's Chingachgook, Tosk is naively confused by O'Brien's new-fangled technology, but reassures us that man (or humanoid) is deep-down compelled to act nobly.

As with many of the one-off species the Star Trek series introduces, Tosk is designed to win the audience's compassion, and by corollary, loathe whomever his enemies are. Clearly he is a busy alien with places to go and people to see (or not see), but his candor and child-like lack of awareness desperately ask the viewer's sympathy. In another universe, maybe O'Brien and Tosk would have modified podracers on Tatooine, but in this cruel reality, we learn that Tosk's best-case scenario is death in the course of duty.

These are the episodes where Star Trek gets a little preachy, though the message in this episode is less sickeningly sweet than others. Tosk is flagrantly one-dimensional, but straw men like him and his would-be captors often are to focus the message on the real issues at play.

Beyond the main (and only) story arc, "Captive Pursuit" called attention to a few plot holes common across the franchise's series which give me a chuckle:

• Like Picard and Kirk abandoning their bridges before him, Sisko leaves Ops upon hearing of the intruders on the Promenade. I maintain how little sense this makes. Sisko has security personnel better equipped to handle any violence. And if the intruders are hostile, how much of a distraction would his safety be? I'm sure Odo's funk (I mean c'mon, he has to smell, right?) makes Sisko want to leave whenever he can, but I never understand Star Trek's desire to have commanding officers chased from their command centers by trouble.
• Speaking of Odo, "Captive Pursuit" again uses the "Odo as a background object" trick (this time, a painting) for when Tosk attempts to get to the arsenal. For a while, it seemed like that trick would be DS9's David-Caruso-one-liner-sunglasses-removal trick.
• And speaking of that weapons arsenal, would you allow your station's computer to not only be accessed by a Gamma Quadrant stranger, but to tell him where the weapons locker is? When Tosk asked, "Show me where the weapons are stored," I was actually half-shocked not to have the computer deny him.
• Another Star Trek staple is when a core character has to choose between following orders and doing what he or she thinks is right. If pressed, I think could name a scenario where every senior staff member of TNG's Enterprise directly violated orders to follow their consciences. Maybe the 23rd Century is a more forgiving time, but isn't that grounds for immediate dismissal (or, you know, death) in every navy you've ever heard of? I also enjoy the obvious removal of the communicator when the character has to make the choice against duty. I get it, writers: They're going against the Starfleet Shield on this one.

And lastly, a couple of odds and ends:

• Auberjonois' execution of the double take upon Sisko's unstated order not to capture O'Brien is outstanding. The wryness Auberjonois injects into Odo is one of the series' acting highlights.
• In rewatching this episode, I wondered if Terry Farrell's hair poof indicates Jersey Shore fashion will have a revival in the Federation's outer reaches. If so, is it fair to call Worf a juice-head gorilla?

2.5 bars of gold-pressed latinum out of 5

Tasting Notes: Birra Moretti La Rossa

First impression: Let's keep the Germans and Italians separate.

For full disclosure's sake, I admit that my experiences with Italian beer have been decidedly unenjoyable. I find Peroni to fall into the lower rungs of mass-produced brews, and my other tastings have fallen into the same categories.

So I was immediately skeptical of an Italian brewer attempting to do something Germans do so well. After all, when a country has so much enthusiasm for its wine production, how much can we expect of its grain-based alcohol.

On first smell, La Rossa (a doppelbock) reminded me of Newcastle and other brown ales. And yet, it clearly had the deeper color and persistently thick head that are typical of its family.

Again, I have to color my review by admitting that La Rossa falls into the dreaded middle between my preferred neighborhoods of really dark or really light beer (call it the Oreo syndrome). The malty-ness wasn't overpowering as it can be in some beers like this, but it was markedly sweet. I found the middle of the tongue to balance this with the toasted flavors.

Was it memorably bad? Not at all. But perhaps worse, it is easily forgettable.

Order a Pint: Eh
Buy a Six-Pack: No
Stock by the Case: No

Tasting Notes: Samuel Smith's Taddy Porter

First impressions: And a good day to you, guv'nah.


In my taste buds' younger days, I had a difficult time distinguishing between porters and stouts. You know the general terms: They're dark, viscous, and supposedly contain tastes of coffee and chocolate. Stouts just seemed to fit those characteristics a little more.

As my taste buds have passed through adolescence, a semester at taste bud community college, and a nasty breakup with cucumbers, I have come to appreciate the subtle differences in dark beers. And Samuel Smith's Taddy Porter highlights many of those best traits in the breed.

The Taddy Porter is a grown-up porter, dressed up in the sophisticated richness of its stout brothers. It carries the same quality of thickness that mid-stouts demonstrate, and tasted best on the back of the tongue. With that said, it avoids the sheer leaden heft of many stouts and is surprisingly drinkable with pace.

If stouts are the spells to cast against the coldest of winter's evil, the Taddy Porter is the vernacular of late fall, spoken in the weeks before we are prepared for the coming intemperate battle. Sipping it while insisting "It's not that cold yet" might just make you believe your claim.

Order a Pint: Yes
Buy a Six-Pack: Yes
Stock by the Case: If porter's your thing

Rating: 4.5 kegs out of 5